In the past, M**** had a handful of friends that knew about M****’s condition and were very supportive, but there were also people in church that were NOT so supportive and she soon became the topic of their conversations. They made it known to her that she either had demons or she was faking it.

M**** has been diagnosed with a condition called DID (Dissociation Identity Disorder) formerly known as MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder). Copied and pasted below at the end of this email is the definition of DID taken from the Christian Ministry website Restoration in Christ Ministries: http://rcm-usa.org/What-is-DID.htm

There is a lot of shame that goes along with this disorder. M**** doesn’t even understand and is just starting to grasp it. She was diagnosed with DID four years ago and at that time she only knew of two personalities, Mimi – a 5 year old (and a hilarious one at that, in my opinion) and Amanda a 25 year old dominatrix… who both she pretty much did her best to pretend didn’t exist… until recently.

Since she has been here, God pretty much made circumstances so that there was no choice and no way of denying their existence. It has taken almost six months for M**** to finally accept and fully believe that her alters (personalities) are “real”.

The first time Mimi came out was one early morning when she came out of M****’s room to wake me up! Lol. She had a bad dream and she wanted me to pray for her. The second time she came out was in October around Halloween when our friend C****** and I were shopping. Someone walked by and I noticed M****s demeanor change and in a split second, Mimi appeared. She stayed around for about 3 hours.

Since that day, we have had Amanda, 16 year old Michelle, 40 year old Lexi and some others that we are aware about but haven’t been out or stayed out for long enough for us to get to know.

First and foremost, I need to make it very CLEAR, that Mimi, Amanda etc. are NOT DEMONS. Mimi is a wonderful 5 year old with the funniest sense of humor – she LOVES Snickers, hamburgers, Veggie Tales, coloring and ice cream. She has been living with us off and on for 4 months now and if anyone tried to tell me that she was anything other than a 5 year old I would have to tell them to come live with us for a week before they make any assumptions.

Another thing – before I was a Christian and especially after I got clean and sober – I have had a number of experiences with demons and the demonic and demon possessed people. Demons do NOT repent. They do not have compassion, love or praise and sing to Jesus!!! After Mimi , Amanda, Abigail, Michelle and Lexi prayed to receive Jesus as their Lord and Savior Daryl and I have been so blessed to SEE before our very own eyes – DRAMATIC conversions, repentant hearts and a change in attitude.

Granted, this did NOT happen overnight and it was NOT easy!!! Before they gave their hearts to Jesus there was an almost tangible opposition and conflict constantly going on.

This last 6 months has been the most AMAZING journey – lots of ups and downs but so so worth it – we have had so many laughs and good times (as well as lots of tears). Mimi is absolutely hilarious, Amanda is a strong and intelligent… Michelle is sweet and sensitive…

Long story short, this is one of the reasons why M**** has not been at church, or if she is at church and Daryl and I appear to be protective of her or if she seems stand-off-ish – it’s because it may not be her!!! It may be shy Michelle (who has a lisp and is very very self conscious about it but who everyone who’s met her thinks is so endearing and love it) Lexi who sounds Cajun, or Mimi who sounds and acts like a typical 5 year old and who M**** gave strict orders not to talk because if Mimi talked to someone who knows M**** they would wonder why the heck she was talking like a 5 year old and then next week if they saw M**** why she would not remember talking to the same person at all.

So, M**** prayed about it and talked about it and she decided to let us tell people about this because she is tired of hiding and living in shame. M**** feels that if Mimi or Michelle or whoever is out that if they are not sick, they should be going to church! One other reason is that M**** felt that it would be less stressful on Daryl and I not to have to hide it. M**** came to this conclusion because there are several people that go to both churches we attend who know about her DID and they love and accept her and all of her parts/personalities (we call them her “family”) as well as a small number of people who have come through (or are still going through) the same or similar disorder with Jesus and others who are educated and experienced with DID that support her.

M**** is sick and tired of Tony who knows about her DID and has known about it for years – hanging it over her head and threatening to tell people about it – now that SHE is the one who’s told people about it, he can’t hold it against her anymore.

Basically, if you have any questions about this feel free to ask me about it – I am being very protective of M**** so any emails or questions you have will be filtered through me first. On the other hand – if this scares you (I’m sorry, but many Christians are very extreme – either all or nothing – all demons or all psych/mental – this is NOT a mental disorder) please keep your comments to yourself.

Please do not stare, point, shun, whisper etc. when M**** is around – she is not a freak and does not want to feel like one whenever she goes to church. Not that any of you would do this but from past experiences we’ve been amazed at how people act out of fear of unfamiliar.

Just talk to M**** however you normally would when you see her, and if she isn’t M****, we’ll be more than happy to introduce you to who you’re talking to!

This is a very real disorder and there is enough shame and embarrassment attached to this without people adding to it. What M**** and her alters need more than anything is LOVE, God’s love demonstrated through His people, whether or not you understand this… let me just say that if you loved and enjoyed M**** when you first met her and spent some time with her – she is still the same person and you will love her alters as well. If not even more.

Thank you!!!

What is DID?

See Glossary of Terms

Definitions, Frequency, and Cause of DID

Excerpts (some paraphrased) from the upcoming book on:

Restoring the Shattered:

Recognizing and Restoring Complex DID

by Tom R. Hawkins, Ph.D.

DEFINITION OF DISSOCIATION

Dissociation is generally considered to be a disturbance or alteration in consciousness, memory, identity or perception of the environment. Normally, a person integrates these various functions, whereas dissociation is a compartmentalization of these functions. Dissociation is a process whereby the mind separates one or more aspects of its function (knowing, feeling, tasting, hearing, seeing, etc.) away from the normal stream of consciousness.

Dissociation lies on a continuum ranging from the normal phenomena of day dreaming, fantasy, and “highway hypnosis” on the one end to the polyfragmented (highly complex) multiple whose mind is split into hundreds (or thousands) of separate identities on the other end. This condition was formerly known as Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD), but was changed to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) in 1994 by the American Psychiatric Association with its publication of DSM-IV, in order to more accurately describe the disorder.

In the case of dissociation outside the bounds of “normal” dissociation (i.e. highway hypnosis), the mental separation involves the building of a more or less permanent and impermeable wall between the separated components so that part of the person can be unaffected by a given experience. We believe that such a defense is a temporary God-given capacity that enables a child to survive overwhelming trauma, though later in life this compartmentalization usually leads to dysfunction.

Once a child successfully employs the dissociative defense, dissociation usually becomes the preferred defensive mechanism and often will be used subsequently even when less extreme defense processes might suffice in threat containment.¹

definition of dissociative identity disorder (DID) (formerly known as MPD)

Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is not to be confused with demonization or schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by the following:

• Two or more personality states or distinct identities who think, feel, and choose from a different world view. As a result, each identity perceives God, themselves, other persons and their environment differently.

• Two or more distinct identities must (at different times) take control of a person’s behavior.

• Though normal memory is hard to define, there is general agreement in the mental health field that persons exhibiting DID have more memory loss than a non-dissociated person.

• The resulting disturbances in the functions of the mind are not due to a medical condition or the effects of drugs or alcohol.

• These extreme Dissociative experiences are not due to psychosis (being out of touch with reality).

It is also common to have personality fragments, which are defined as a part of the person with a persistent and separate sense of identity but a limited (compared to a personality) range of function, emotion, or history.²

DID can present itself in a variety of subtle ways (explained in detail in Breaking the Chains of DID). Few cases will be as obvious as the stereotypical Sybil with dramatic, abrupt switching from one personality state to another. Most multiples will initially be unaware of such switches and will attribute changes in the way they perceive God, themselves, others and their environment as just mood swings. Total amnesia among the presenting identities is no longer viewed as part of the diagnostic criteria.

This condition is defined fully in Tom’s book, Dissociative Identity Disorder: Recognizing and Restoring the Severely Abused (not yet released), where the complete DSM-IV definition is given.

frequency of DID

According to the psychiatrist, Dr. Colin Ross, some form of pathological dissociation may affect as much as ten percent of the population.³ DID itself, according to his data may affect at least one percent of the general population.⁴ Other researchers have reported that as much as 20 to 50% of psychiatric hospital inpatients suffer from dissociative disorders.⁵ Many working in the field will not be surprised if further studies demonstrate that as much as five percent or more of the population has DID. Many of these are people who, in the past, were misdiagnosed by the medical and mental health community. Previously the disorder was so narrowly defined and considered such a rarity that it was little studied or understood. Fortunately, that lack is now being corrected, though the societal “need” for denial has not diminished.

cause of DID

It is generally agreed that in about 97% of the cases where dissociative identity is  formed, the victims suffered serious abuse at an early age. Friesen comments,

Most of them have been abused sexually. They needed to use dissociation to cope with the abuse. . . .the life circumstances have been dangerous, and the children continue to suffer abuse over a long period of time. The home is not a safe place, and the child needs to keep on using dissociation to deal with the continuing abuse.⁶

It is not always true, but too often the home is the source of the abuse.

DID is not caused by a brain or chemical deficiency. In fact, multiples are usually above average in intelligence and creativity.  In this sense DID is not a pathological sickness but rather a God-given, temporary coping mechanism for an overwhelmed child whose only options were to dissociate, lose touch with reality (go crazy), or commit suicide. DID is generally considered a “disorder” rather than a mental illness because it is not caused by defective brain chemistry and treatment is usually effective. Someone with DID might be described more accurately as a normal person with a normal brain responding to the abnormal experience of overwhelming trauma. It is helpful to note that the literature in the field reflects an approximate 80% to 90% cure rate for those multiples who stay in therapy.